I didn't get approved for Tenncare. Figures, if you work and try to be a contributing member of society you don't get jack but the losers that have never done anything to add to this world other then one more leach get to reap the benefits I have worked my butt off for.
So with that, I'm stuck with my crappy midwife because now even if I wanted to deliver in a hospital I can't afford it (the newest mantra of my life by-the-way) she averages 2-3 days to return my emails. Is a half hour late to my ultrasound appointment, then even wants to bail on the appointment and is going to be bringing her 1 and a half year old daughter to my house when I'm in labor and delivering...so much for a quiet peaceful birth.
I love the idea of midwives, but not the idea of their children being present when I'm in labor. I hate children in general in my house. I have even requested to not have Visiting teachers that have small children because I don't want to be rude and tell them to not bring them, or be side tracked when they are here and enjoy the company because I'm so concerned about the rugrat wandering through my non-kid friendly house wreaking my things and putting their grubby fingerprints all over my house full of glass.
It stresses me out!! But in order to save money this baby will be here, while I'm trying to have a baby. I have no other options. I have looked for another midwife but none deliver in my home in Clarksville. I hate being stuck in a situation I'm not happy in. Not sure yet how I'm going to fix this situation. Laura said she will help out by having her kids over to help side track the baby while I'm in labor. But this whole situation just shouldn't even have to play out like this. I don't want to and shouldn't have to have to get a babysitter here to watch my midwifes kid! That's crazy!!!!!
I still have not gained any weight. By mid week I was eating a little better, but it still makes me feel sick and is not enjoyable. I hate eating, or the after effects after I force myself to.
I'm going to the temple today! I have a lot on my mind hopefully I will get some clarity and come out with a more clear picture of what I'm supposed to do about a few different areas in my life.
The baby is the length of a carrot now.
hmmm, i still have spellcheck and pic layout is the same. ??? try clicking on design where they changed that...upper right...and choose a new template. maybe that is the problem?? i hate crap like that, so sorry!! :( gotta keep looking for a new midwife so you can be more at ease. i think you are being tested after giving that super awesome talk :) praying the temple helped change your mood.
ReplyDeleteoh! and i can't wait til you have a kid so you can relax a bit, lol! :)-
no worries about gaining weight...it will come and i don't think it is abnormal, everyone is different.
bummer about tenncare, i wondered about that.
i will reaffirm to the kids they can NOT go to aunt jenn and uncle evan's house :):):)
BIB, BIG, HUGE HUG FOR YOU, dear sister!!!
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