Improvement!!

I'm proud of myself and see major improvement in my social interaction, so after all my posts about failed social experiences, I should balance it out when I can with the positive.

Today I went to a Lunch Bunch that the RS sister's in my ward have once a month.  We get together at one gals house, we all bring a dish to share and have a great time fellowshiping while our children play.

When I got there, there were a handful of ladies already there, I knew all of them.  I only got a friendly smile from a few. So it sort of wasn't a very warm welcome.  But I felt okay.  But I did recognize that it didn't feel good to not feel welcome.

I think the old Jenn may have left, or found a corner and try to be invisible.  BUT, instead I made a mental decision to really make whoever came after me feel welcome.  So I made sure to smile and say the person name if I knew it, say Hi, and let them know I was glad to see them, or glad they came.  It wasn't hard to be nice at all, the only reason it had to be conscious was because it is easy for me to talk negative to myself, that no one cares if I say hi to them, or no one wants me to talk to them because no one likes me; and after the welcome I got it is typical for me to reaffirm those negative thoughts, with, "see, no one likes you, they are just pretending to be nice to you because they feel they have to since you are in the ward and it's a church activity."

The conversations I did have with people were very, very short, only a couple sentences before THEY moved onto someone else.  I did try to participate in other conversations, by at least being present to listen.  I stayed upbeat and positive and kept smiling, because I felt it.  I'm just really proud of myself because I'm very familiar with those situations and I know how I usually am.  So today, I'm very proud of myself!  I even did a good job at asking questions and showing interest in others.  Way to go me!!