Nice night

I admit, I'm not in the celebrating mood right now, I'd hate to see myself much more down then I am lately.

I was pretty pessimistic of how our Anniversary would go. I shot low, so as to no longer be let down by anymore things. I would not have been upset if we didn't even acknowledge our special day. Since it is our plan to go and do something special later, once we get settled and have more stable jobs/income. I don't even want to buy a stick a gum right now. That is just how I get when I feel broke. I live off Ramen and cut out every extra expense known to man.

Evan wanted us to go to dinner and a movie. I REALLY did not want to spend any money. But I knew Evan wanted to do this for me to make me feel better. It's sort of bitter sweet. We spent money we didn't have, but Evan got us out of the house to do something special and make the best of it all. Which I am thankful for, I'm unable to pick myself up out of my funk, so I'll rest on Evan if he is willing to put his hand in.

We went to Longhorns, and unfortunately the salmon I ordered was not what my pregnant tongue wanted. I ate one bite and could stand no more. We got a box for Evan to eat it later, then forgot it on the table. I'm VERY, VERY not happy to have just wasted $15. Egh, I can cry at the thought, so we will move on.

We went and saw the movie Date Night. Which we have really been wanting to see. We loved it. We went home laughing and quoting lines we thought were hilarious! It was a really great evening. But the difference between Evan and I is, Evan can put aside his worries and compartmentalizes really well, I can not, everything ties together. My head is a huge ball of tangled up yarn. You can't pull one string without making a tighter knot somewhere else in the mix. Everything is connected, nothing can be ignored.

I can't wait till we have our stuff, are settled in our own place, we both have full times jobs, and I'm putting globs of money back into my savings account. THEN, hopefully I will be more excited for this baby. Right now I find it a HUGE inconvenience that I'm dreading with everything in me.